Please don’t take from my bucket, it is almost empty

almost empty

Please don’t take from my bucket, it is almost empty

I have been awake for most of the night with my newborn and up since 4:45am with my toddler.

Please don’t take from my bucket, it is almost empty.

My toddler needs me to get up make him breakfast and my baby needs me to sit down and feed him breakfast.

Please don’t take from my bucket, it is almost empty.

Instead of waking up to “Good morning!” and a kiss and a cuddle, my pre-schooler wakes up to a cranky hungry baby, a cranky hungry toddler and a mother fully engrossed in trying to split herself in two to please them both. So he acts out to get attention.

Please don’t take from my bucket, it is almost empty.

My pre-schooler needs help packing his bag, my toddler needs help putting on his shoes and I when I wake the baby up from his nap to take him on the school run I realise he has had a “blow-out”.

Please don’t take from my bucket, it is almost empty.

almost empty
While my kids are clean, dry and looking respectable I look like a dog’s breakfast. My clothes are stained with milk and food, I really need to wash my hair and no amount of concealer is going to be able to hide the fact that I am completely exhausted. I am fooling no one.
Please don’t take from my bucket, it is almost empty.

We arrive at the school gate and it is pouring with rain, my toddler has taken his shoes off and my baby is crying because he is hungry again. My options are to either watch my pre-schooler as he walks to the gate and takes himself to class without me or stand in the rain and get soaked as I put my toddlers shoes back on, unstrap everyone from their car seats, run them in, drop my pre-schooler off, run back and strap my toddler and baby back into the car again. Either way, I am going to feel guilty.

Please don’t take from my bucket, it is almost empty.

I am not saying this to have a whinge, I love my life and I am grateful for my children. I am not saying this to ask for your help, even though it would be nice to pee in peace or wash my hair without constantly checking if the baby is crying.

What I am trying to explain to you that while there is something left in my bucket if I give you the last few drops then it will be bone dry. Who then will look after my children?

almost empty

My children are my responsibility. It is my duty as a mother to take care of myself and fill up my own bucket so I am able to take care of my children and add to their bucket. If don’t then who will?

A part of being a good and responsible parent is learning to say no when I need to. That is the beauty of motherhood; your kids give you the strength you didn’t know you had.

So no, you can’t have what is in my bucket, it is almost empty. What I have left is reserved for the people that need it the most, my children and for myself so I can get through the day.

 

9 thoughts on “Please don’t take from my bucket, it is almost empty


  1. Warning: trim() expects parameter 1 to be string, object given in /home/marayab/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-user.php on line 203
    Joleene

    Been there! Good post. Sometimes people don’t see what a Mama has to deal with! You’re doing great. 💗

    Reply

  2. Warning: trim() expects parameter 1 to be string, object given in /home/marayab/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-user.php on line 203
    Zana

    Being a mom isn’t an easy job definitely.. but it’s worth it
    I think that mothers should get more respect.
    Thanks for sharing this.
    I can’t wait to be a mom one day. 🙂

    Reply

  3. Warning: trim() expects parameter 1 to be string, object given in /home/marayab/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-user.php on line 203
    Jasmin N

    This was so amazingly written! Made me think.
    Thank you for sharing your thoughts 🙂

    Reply

  4. Warning: trim() expects parameter 1 to be string, object given in /home/marayab/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-user.php on line 203
    Rachel Stewart

    I have to admit “no” is such a good word and I’ve been using it a lot lately. Ie. No I can’t help out with that thing at school. Or go out to something. Or help with something. Or even just make too many plans. (though I will totally go out if it’s a let my hair down, recharge emotionally, kind of thing). Because yeah, i can’t do everything and be everything for everyone.

    And I feel like a shitty friend sometimes, but I can’t give what i don’t have.

    Reply

  5. Warning: trim() expects parameter 1 to be string, object given in /home/marayab/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-user.php on line 203
    Maikel

    What a strong post! Stay strong honey, you can do it!

    Reply

  6. Warning: trim() expects parameter 1 to be string, object given in /home/marayab/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-user.php on line 203
    Cindy @YKOT

    Can totally relate to having a near empty bucket. Mothers are giving giving giving ball the time and sometimes it is hard with little kids to refuel and fill out buckets. Sometimes it doesn’t take much – a comment, a look, a sigh to drain the last bit. Take care of yourself and reach out for help when you need it.

    Reply

  7. Warning: trim() expects parameter 1 to be string, object given in /home/marayab/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-user.php on line 203
    Kylie Travers

    I completely understand this and think it is great of you to recognise those moments and to stand strong on the need to look after yourself and your family.

    Reply

  8. Warning: trim() expects parameter 1 to be string, object given in /home/marayab/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-user.php on line 203
    Saranda

    I don’t want to judge or sound like a know-it-all… but while I think there is truth in the fact that as a mother you need to take care of yourself, you are not on your own. If you need it let people help you with taking care of yourself, so you don’t empty your bucket! Please use a little bit of your bucket for yourself as well. Sending you a lot of love <3

    Reply

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